John Dies at the End - My First Ever DNF

I'd been considering reading John Dies at the End for years, but I didn't want to read This Book is Full of Spiders (the sequel) because, like any sane person, I hate spiders. I ended up buying the entire series anyway (I put a book cover on TBiFoS), half because of the reviews and half because I'm somewhat antagonistic and my boyfriend's name is John.

John Dies at the End is not an easy book to take notes on. I didn't know how to go about it. How do you even begin to explain this story to someone? Dave's friend, John, goes out and parties one night and calls Dave over in a panic. Dave arrives, finds John in bad shape, grabs the syringe John probably injected himself with and puts it in his pocket (bad place for it), ends up accidentally injecting himself with the weird drug (Soy Sauce) and now...He can see ghosts? He can "read minds." He knows exactly how many grains of rice are on a person's plate (5,829) and where it was grown (Arkansas). Reading that back to myself, I'm thinking, this is the worst plot summary I could have possibly written, but at least it's accurate.

So here's the thing. The book is kind of gross and early on, I found myself thinking, "I should have waited before buying the other two books in this series." I'm not saying it's bad, it's just not really my particular kind of humor. The book has great ratings and most people seem to love it, so this is one of those times where it really is personal to me and what I like and dislike, and not the overall book*

*That was the last thing I wrote in my notes before I decided to DNF the book. One of the patrons where I work told me her mother always said that life is too short to read a book you're not enjoying when there are so many other books out there. She's right. As much as it pains me to do it, I have to stop forcing myself to read books that I know I'm not enjoying. I made myself finish reading House of Leaves and I was miserable. I wanted to love John Dies at the End like everyone else does, but the humor isn't my style and I'm kind of put off by it. Trying to force myself to read it so I could write a post about it killed any motivation I had to work on this blog at all. I'm not saying it's the book's fault, I'm not saying the book is bad (there must be a reason it has so many positive reviews, right?), I'm saying John Dies at the End isn't my kind of story. Maybe I'll pick it up again one day and enjoy it, but right now, I'm done.

With all that being said. I've been really good about updating this blog for the past month, but I'm taking a break for a week or two to watch K-dramas, read romance novels, play video games with my boyfriend and work on more posts. Because it takes time to watch movies and read books. I'll be back with Pet Sematary, The Monster Squad and Resident Evil soon. I also kind of want to do an "I watched this terrible movie so you don't have to" kind of thing, but I don't think I hate my life that much.

The Folio Society

About a month ago, I did a google search for Something Wicked This Way Comes by Ray Bradbury. I was really hoping to find a nice edition of it because I only have a cheap paperback version and I just...Wanted something better. I love Ray Bradbury because, as I've said 57 million times already, he really understood fall and when I read his stories, I can feel the season. I feel the chill in the air, I hear the crunching leaves. Something Wicked This Way Comes reminds me of going to Oktoberfest as a child. It transports me back to that time of fall festivals and all the fond memories I have of them. So yes. I wanted a nicer edition of it.

Luckily for me, the search turned up an image of a beautifully illustrated cover, an edition from The Folio Society, a company I had never heard of before. My brain kept telling me that something that well designed couldn't possibly be easy on my wallet. And it wasn't. I didn't care though, this was what I was looking for. 

Browsing through Folio Society's website, I found about 10 different novels I would have loved to purchase, but they are pretty expensive, so I'll have to add them into my collection little by little. Their books are worth the price though. Each one comes with a slipcase, a cloth cover, and the binding is sewn in 16 page sections. They include several stunning illustrations exclusive to FS's collection. Most books are in the $50-$80 range, but there are some that cost significantly more. The company is based in the UK and when I received my orders (in New York), they arrived in a small box, inside a huge white bag (about the size of a large garbage bag). I've read from several people in the US that they had issues with their orders arriving damaged with that packaging, but I had no problems myself and both orders arrived within around 2 weeks.

In addition to Something Wicked This Way Comes, I bought a few other books. It was hard to narrow down which ones I wanted, but in the end, I decided to go with the ones I didn't already own copies of. I purchased Rebecca and Jane Eyre, both of which I had been meaning to read at some point. I also bought a copy of The Hobbit for my boyfriend.

I love the artistry that goes into The Folio Society's collection and even though they're pricey, I do recommend their books. These books make beautiful gifts, so if there's a book lover in your life, I definitely suggest browsing their website.

Beetlejuice The Musical - A Show About Death

Yesterday, I went to see Beetlejuice on Broadway. Full Disclosure: I didn't like the movie and I didn't expect to like the musical because of that. I only bought tickets for it because I was going to be in the city anyway (to see A Musical About Star Wars with my boyfriend) and I've been dying to see Kerry Butler in something, anything, for years. That being said...

I. LOVED. IT. This was the most fun I've ever had at a Broadway musical (and I've been to Legally Blonde three times, as well as Rock of Ages) and you could tell the rest of the audience felt the same way. I think that added a lot to it, too. It was the cast's perfect comedic timing and the audience's laughter that made the entire experience so enjoyable. Beetlejuice is absurd and ridiculous and out of control, and I mean that in the best possible way. It 110% deserves all 8 of its Tony Award nominations, as well as a few others it didn't receive (like Sophia Anne Caruso for Best Leading Actress in a Musical, it's a crime that she didn't receive a nomination for her performance). This is in my top 3 Broadway shows of all time, and that's a big claim to make because I've seen and enjoyed a lot of them. I would go back to see Beetlejuice over and over again.

I obviously went to see Kerry Butler and she was beautiful and so talented and so committed to her role. But the entire cast was wonderful. Alex Brightman made Beetlejuice likable and he was incredibly funny. John said he's very "genie-esque" (Aladdin - Broadway), and I fully agree, he's like a dark, twisted version of him. He's adorable, too! I'm really glad they didn't make him repulsive like Beetlejuice was in the film. (I know, I know, he's supposed to be repulsive, but I didn't like the movie, remember?) And Sophia Anne Caruso? When she opened her mouth and started singing, I couldn't believe it. As soon as her first song was over, I looked at John and said, "She's really good." That's such an understatement, she's so far beyond good, I don't even have a word for it. They were all so perfect, the entire cast is amazingly talented.

And they're not the only ones. The crew, the orchestra, the lighting and set designers, the costume designers, the writers...They put together such an awesome, fun, weird musical. The sets and lighting are spectacular. And the puppets! I loved the sand worm, I think that was one of my favorite things about the entire production, as well as the skeleton costumes. I don't have one bad thing to say about this show, and that's so rare, I almost never give rave reviews about anything, I can always find something I don't like, or something that could be improved. But Beetlejuice is perfect exactly as it is.

I recommend this show for anyone, except small children (kids under the age of 4 can't get in anyway) because there are a lot of sexual jokes and some cursing and you may not want them to hear that. But it's funny and weird and even cute and surprisingly heartwarming. I can't wait for the cast album to be released on June 28th, as well as the souvenir book (I collect them from each show I go to, they said it should be out within a couple months). I hope Beetlejuice will have a long, successful run at the Winter Garden Theatre and I hope I'm able to see it again soon.

The H.P. Lovecraft Historical Society

The H.P. Lovecraft Historical Society was "founded" in 1986 by Sean Branney, when during a LARPing session on a college campus, people who were unaware of what was going on called the campus police. Sean explained the incident away by saying the group was the HPLHS, and from there, it became a real thing, started by himself, Andrew Leman and Phil Bell. Now that you know how they started, here's some of what they have to offer, my personal recommendations and a little bit about their store.

When I visited California last summer, I went to the HPLHS storefront with my boyfriend. The man working that day was very kind. I felt a bit uncomfortable though because we were the only people in the store and I have social anxiety, so I felt...Awkward hanging around, like I was being a nuisance. Again, the man working there couldn't have been nicer and he didn't make me feel that way at all, that's all my brain's fault. The point I'm getting at is, they have so many amazing things in that store, including props from their films, and I really wanted to stay and look around forever, but my brain hates me, so I left pretty fast after purchasing the one DART episode I didn't already own. Even though I was there for such a short time, it was the highlight of my trip.

The HPLHS sells a wide variety of merchandise. Their movies are great (I wish they would film an adaptation of The Shadow Over Innsmouth), and they're filmed as if they were made in the 1920's/1950's. The Call of Cthulhu is a silent film and The Whisperer in Darkness is very reminiscent of 50's sci fi movies.

Where they really shine is their Dark Adventure Radio Theatre episodes. I own all of them (as of the time I'm writing this post) and I enjoyed listening to each of them. The standouts for me are The Shadow Over Innsmouth (of course), The Haunter of the Dark and A Solstice Carol (which includes an adaptation of The Outsider, one of my favorite Lovecraft stories). Each DART episode includes several props and the HPLHS released a really nice binder to store all the props in, with sleeves featuring artwork from each episode. If you need a way to store your CDs, they also have cute old-time radio cases that can fit 4 standard CD cases.

DART prop binder

Newspaper prop from Dagon: War of Worlds

They have also released an audiobook of Lovecraft's complete fiction. These aren't radio plays like the DART episodes, they're just narrating his stories in this collection. The packaging is beautiful, it looks like a library book.

The HPLHS also sells books, replicas of Weird Tales magazine (I believe these come from an outside source, but I'm not sure), Lovecraft inspired albums, apparel (including a varsity jacket that you can buy pins for) and more. You can see how much love the people who run the HPLHS have for Lovecraft's work when you take a look at everything they've worked on.

Decoder pin

They even have memberships available to purchase. You can pay annually ($20 a year) or become a lifetime member, like I am. If you become a lifetime member (a one time payment of $100), in addition to a certificate proclaiming your membership, you'll also receive a "passport-style membership card." For me, it was more than worth it to become a lifetime member of the HPLHS. Their products are such good quality, I wanted to be able to support them and thank them in some way for all they do.

Membership certificate, membership card, varsity pins and membership pin

If you're a fan of H.P. Lovecraft, or horror, or even audiobooks/radio plays, I cannot recommend the HPLHS enough.

(As of the time I'm writing this, a new DART episode, The Lurking Fear, is available for pre-order. DART episodes are no longer going to be released in jewel cases, instead they will now come in cardboard cases and you'll receive a prop sleeve with them. I've already pre-ordered my copy. The Lurking Fear is expected to ship in June.)

Horror Themed Board Games

This is going to be a long post. I'll keep it as short as I possibly can, but it's still going to be long, despite my best efforts. Here we go.

I don't like competitive games, usually. And by that, I mean games where everyone is competing against each other. (Well, of course that's what you mean by competitive. Competing against. :eyeroll:) I'll elaborate. I love co-op games where everyone is working together. And what I love even more than co-op games are betrayal games, where you have to work as a team, but you also have no idea who in your group is about to screw you over. I've gotten pretty good at One Night Ultimate Werewolf (I owe a lot to BouncinMouncin's Youtube channel), I've become a fantastic liar. In games, I either want to help you, or I secretly want to kill you. I'm not into openly competitive games. Take a look.

Many of these games can be played solo, and that's why I bought them. Aside from my boyfriend, the only people I know who like board games are my dad and his wife. Unfortunately, they're more like...Monopoly/Clue kind of people and I don't have the patience to explain more complicated games to them. If I want to play a board game, I'm pretty much on my own. (Except for Mysterium. That one is pretty easy to pick up and they were able to learn how to play it quickly.) I have all these games and so many expansions for Eldritch Horror and Arkham Horror LCG, but I honestly rarely ever get to play them because I don't usually have the time to set three hours aside (yes, three hours) for a board game and when I do have the time, this happens and I just want to give up on life.

I'll give brief descriptions of the games I actually own (when I have more time to play around with them, I'll write dedicated posts about each individual game), what kind of people might like them, and add any insight I may have into them. Let's start with all the Fantasy Flight Games Arkham Horror Files games. And just so you know, with FFG, you're probably going to lose at least...75% of the time, so if you're one of those people who can't handle that, especially when you're averaging three hours per game, I don't think these are the games for you. However, if you're in it for the experience, these are some great options.

The H.P. Lovecraft Collection: Slip-Cased Edition

Several years ago, I purchased The Complete Fiction of H.P. Lovecraft. (I actually bought it twice, not realizing the second copy was the exact same book with a different cover.) It's a really beautiful book, with a cloth cover, ribbon bookmark and a slipcover. Basically, the perfect collector's item. I tried to read the stories in that book, but as you can imagine, it's huge, with over 1,000 pages and that made things difficult. That's the only complaint I have about the collection.

So I was really excited when I was browsing on Amazon a few weeks ago and I saw a "new" set that was released about a year and a half ago (how did I miss that?), The H.P. Lovecraft Collection: Slip-cased Edition. According to one of the reviews, this set includes all of Lovecraft's stories, with the exception of one collaboration he did. And the best thing about it is that it's broken down into 6 separate volumes, which will make it so much easier to read than the larger book. I ordered it immediately.

Size comparison between The Complete Fiction of H.P. Lovecraft and the Slip-cased Edition.

Someone said these books use the Spongebob font and I can't unsee it.

If I had to buy one set...I wouldn't. I would buy both, honestly. That's the collector in me. Both editions are beautiful and deserve a spot on my already crammed shelves. I can't say one is better than the other.

Also worth nothing is that The New Annotated H.P. Lovecraft (another must-have) is receiving a followup in September - The New Annotated H.P. Lovecraft: Beyond Arkham. I've already pre-ordered my copy and I'll be counting down the days until it arrives on my doorstep.

The Hunter (The Forbidden Game Series Book 1) - L.J. Smith

The Forbidden Game series is written by L.J. Smith and is comprised of three books: The Hunter, The Chase and The Kill. And if you're anything like me, it's one of the best things to ever happen to young adult fiction because it's about a group of friends who play a board game that preys on their greatest fears. (Remember that game Nightmare that came with a VHS tape? It's even worse.) I love board games and I love being scared, throw the two of those things together and you've got my approval, no matter what else happens on those pages.

About what happens on those pages though...Before I started reading Ready Player One, someone gave me the disclaimer (multiple times) that it "doesn't have the best writing." "It isn't Shakespeare," he said. I don't even think he likes Shakespeare. Anyway. To me, "good writing" isn't about browsing through a thesaurus to find new descriptive words to replace everything with. It's not about writing something that sounds like a thesis. It's about having the right tone for the characters you're writing for. In that respect, I thought Ready Player One was very well written. The characters spoke exactly the way I would expect them to, and I really enjoyed the writing style. It was like listening to people I would want to be friends with, and because of that it held my attention. Again, not the point, but I wanted to explain my point of view on this subject before saying this next bit...The Forbidden Game series does not have good writing. Even The Secret Circle series (also by L.J. Smith) did not have good writing. Teenagers don't exclaim, "Oh, Tom!" every time they're exasperated, like a 1950's TV housewife. To be honest though, I don't really care about the writing at all because The Forbidden Game and The Secret Circle series are some of my favorite books from when I was younger and I still love them now, I still go back and reread them every few years.

This will have to be a three part series. I want to talk about everything because let me tell you, The Forbidden Game is a roller coaster ride.

The Hunter starts off with our protagonist, Jenny, trying to find an interesting board game to play during the birthday party she's throwing for her undeserving boyfriend, Tom. She just happens to randomly stumble into a game shop she's never noticed before (no big deal), the kind that carries games like Jumanji. Weird, one of a kind games that you probably shouldn't ever play, considering the plot of this entire book. I wish it existed in real life. Here, Jenny meets an employee so beautiful, she literally forgets her boyfriend's existence. Seriously, the book says, "She forgot Tom's existence." So you know that relationship is rock solid. (In Jenny's defense, Tom is a dick.) The extremely beautiful man offers Jenny The Game. "Mystery. Danger. Seduction. Fear. Secrets revealed. Desires unveiled. Temptation." (Whoa, calm down there, this is a party for HIGH SCHOOLERS.) He hands her...A plain white box, the size of Monopoly. Maybe Jenny should just cancel the party. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ But no, she decided to take her chances with the box that gives no clue as to what's inside. Is it empty? Is it actually Monopoly? Are there spiders inside? Is Tom even worth all this trouble? (No, he is not.) Jenny pays $20 for The Game and heads home. (Imagine paying $20 for a game. I paid around $100 for the Dark Souls board game.)

We're introduced to Jenny's friends at this point, but who cares? None of them are that fascinating and the dialogue is mediocre at best, so they're not worth elaborating on. Instead, let's focus on the fact that Tom gave Jenny a stuffed rabbit with the words "I love you" on it, but he won't tell her he loves her in public. "The fact that he wouldn't say the words in public just made this secret confession all the sweeter." Jenny, you idiot. And let's also focus on the fact that Jenny feels the need to wear a long skirt and pull her hair back, like she's living on the damn prairie, because that's what her boyfriend likes. It's important to acknowledge this because it's the only reason she changes her previous outfit and the way her hair was already styled. Tom tells her how to dress and how to wear her hair because he's controlling and wow do I hate this guy (for many reasons, including the fact that he calls Jenny stupid and never considers her feelings, instead worrying about his own). Maybe if he weren't so self-involved, Jenny wouldn't have felt the need to play The Game and the entire thing could have been avoided.

Tom decides to open the box and check The Game out. Inside, the contents are rather surprising. There are pieces to a 3-foot-tall Victorian paper house, furniture, blank paper dolls (that should be drawn to represent each individual player) and also paper dolls of the Shadow Man (who looks exactly like the employee from the game store) and his friends the Creeper (a snake) and the Lurker (a wolf), cards to tell them what actions to take and instructions which state you'll run into a different nightmare in each room as you attempt to reach the top floor, all while avoiding the Shadow Man. If you run into him, "he'll bring to life your darkest fantasies and make you confess your most secret fears." Each player has to draw their nightmare on a piece of paper, then they're shuffled and placed face down in each room, to be looked at upon entering. The final part of setup requires dimming the lights and reciting an oath, swearing that they're playing of their own free will and the game is real.

...Anddd because they're all stupid enough to follow through on that last step, they're sucked into the paper house. Here, they meet Julian, whom Jenny recognizes as the employee from the game store. He informs the friends that they are playing against him and if he wins, his prize is Jenny. The friends vanish to separate areas of the house and Jenny is left alone in the parlor with Julian. (I acknowledge that Julian is probably a psychopath, but if forced to choose, I would rather be stuck with him than Tom. At least he's interesting.) Julian explains that the door back to the real world is on the top floor of the house and if Jenny makes it there, she can leave, along with any friends she finds along the way. He also warns her that if you die in the game, you die for real. And with that, the game begins!

Spoilers after the jump.

Us (2019)

I went to see Us over the weekend because I loved Get Out and this movie looked really creepy. I wish I didn't have to write about it from memory because I can't be as thorough as I could if I had a DVD that I could pause and take notes while watching it (though I do have the Blu-ray pre-ordered, so maybe I'll come back to this in June).

If you've seen the trailer, you know that Us is about a family being terrorized by a group of people who look identical to them. I don't want to get into the specifics of it because I think this is one of those movies that benefits from you going into it and not really knowing much. It's more unsettling that way.

There was a full theater for the showing I went to and it was interesting to see and hear the audience's reaction throughout the film. People were laughing. A lot. And the movie was humorous, I laughed, too. But every time something made me laugh, I would think to myself, "Yeah, this is funny now, but if I saw people acting (and more specifically, moving) this way in real life, I would cry." I don't think Us is necessarily scary, but it is genuinely creepy and intense. The actors (especially Lupita Nyong'o) were all incredible in their dual roles. There were many times throughout the movie that I turned to my boyfriend and mouthed, "What the ____?" because I couldn't believe what I was seeing. And I glanced over at him a few times and the expressions on his face were pretty priceless.

The score for this film is amazing. It really adds to the overall tension in many of the scenes. I'm just going to say it, Us has the best horror movie soundtrack since Goblin's score for the original Suspiria. I bought it on the train ride home.

The film's ending was somewhat predictable. It had crossed my mind early on that it may potentially happen (I'm trying to be super vague here, sorry if it comes across as nonsensical), but I kept second guessing it. Thinking about it now, I don't know how anyone could miss it, it's right in front of your face for most of the movie.

I feel like this is one of those films that's probably really divisive and people will either love it or hate it. I loved it, it's now three days later and I still can't stop thinking about it. I ran to Reddit and looked at all the theories people have come up with because I wanted more. But, for example, I know this is a movie my mom would absolutely hate because not everything is laid out for you. (I'm not calling her stupid, for the record. She just prefers clear cut endings.) And my dad...He'll definitely either love it or hate it, I'm just not sure which it will be, he surprises me sometimes. He likes some of the worst B-horror films ever made, yet he hated In Fear. I'll never understand him.

I highly recommend Us if you enjoy horror films that leave you thinking about them long after they've ended. I'm still unsettled by it and I have no intention of looking out my windows at night any time soon. The rational part of me knows there's probably nothing out there, the other part of me doesn't want to take the chance of being proven wrong.